Saturday, January 23, 2010

this is coming late... HAPPY !19TH BDAY TWINS!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MEGAN AND MANDY!!!!
This is so late but i though better late than never!!











Tuesday, January 19, 2010

long over due... CAMERA DUMP!!!

so for the young adults we had a "drive in movie" but with it being cold we made cars out of cardboard ours was awesome.!!!
logan being awesome!!
the front of the box truck


the back of our box truck
Park City has this amazing sleeding hill the toe you up and you sled down it was expensive but so worth it.

breanne getting warm in the warming shack.


Breanne and nick. Nick works with me at convergys and i hooked them up and they have been together ever since. this is us sledding in park city on there big hill it was a bit cold that day




My tissue paper spider






Me painting Breanne's room





Me and Whitney Conoeing SO much fun by the way



We had family pictures done this fall. Which we have not had done in years because of vaorious twin issues.


Me


cute spunky megan



kayley who looks grown up



mandy (raccoon kayley says)



All of us together for the first time in a while


Friday, January 15, 2010

faults

there are twso faults that i have that i hate about myself. one i cant say no. it hurts me to say no it kills me. and two the point of this post in reality is i whine. but let me tell you why. most of you know key points in my life where not only i have struggled but my family has struggled me being the oldest i never felt it right for me to whine about what i was going through and because of that i did some stupid stuff to myself like cutting and annorexia. i never once said a word about how bad i was struggling i never once said a word about how attached i was to someone who abused me badly. i had to know where the person was at all times and because of that i do the same thing with any person who i end up loving no matter what kind of love. i hate this i am trying to prevent myself from freaking out but sometimes i cant do much about it. its my drug in a way after i fredak out im happy but i feel like im in a state of daze but let me get back on topic whining. i started whining after the twins moved out i knew i was safe and i didnt have to be strong anymore. and sometimes its about stupid idotic stuff but when did i ever have a chance. so i have decided due to recent events that i need to be strong for my family mainly

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

when one door closes another opens

well as i said before i have lost some friends one of tham is matt. he has been madly in love with me years but i have never felt the same way for him. well today i made a new friend at work named nicholas. who just happens to be matts older brothers best friend. kinda funny eh. well nicholas is gay and i think may turn out to be a good friend. i have had a hard time without having matt in my life anymore but i think the lord put nicholas in my life at the prefect time. im so grateful for this door that has been oppened now i can know how matt is he he arent i smart.

Saturday, December 26, 2009

it has been forever

so it has been forever i apologize. i have been working two jobs at seagull and convergys and i love what i do at both places i have made many friends and it has been good for me to not be stuck in the house so much. altghough i am so busy with life and such. i am srill seeing dallas and to answer your question right off no there isnt a ring someday there will be but for the time being there is not which i am okay with. though my mom is not so much. i have been going through my first crisis as people would call it i have lost some very dear close friends of mine. and although in the long run it will be good for me i struggle to know why things happen. this christmas was a bit wierd for me because it did not feel like christmas it felt like a normal day for the most part. good news there was not as much drama as there was last year but im sad to say yes there was steal drama. my mother turned the big fifty this year and we went to the roof for dinner which was awesomely good but expensive. i made her an awesome book with out favorite memories and pictures. i bought myself and internet phone which i love and yes thats the way im communictaing with you now. well i love you all amd hope you all are doing well

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

been a while

so i started my new job about a week and a half ago. and i have to say i love the people i work with. ill admit some of their personalties rub me wrong but i love it!!! ive been really exhausted however from working so much and not being used to it.
i love that it smowed yesterday!!! mom was in new york so she missed it. too bad for her.
dallas and i are doing good but no ring yet maybe for christmas????

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

ode to the oak tree

you my friend have been a long time friend...
giving us shade...
giving us acorns to make little crafts out of...
letting the grape vine grow on you...
you my friend have given us leaves to play in...
a place for the cats to play on...
a place for us to watch the birds place...
but when the wind blew you over we knew this was it...
our long time friend will have to regrow yourself..
we'll see you again dont worry...
we love you our friend...